I keep trying, but I guess I still have some anxiety over the pain in my abdomen. I just don't know what it is, and it's starting to make me panic a bit, I think. When it hurts as I'm trying to fall asleep, I start thinking of all of the things it could be, and then I can't sleep anymore. It's easy to let your fears get out of control, just as easy as it is to let your sadness take hold.
But I can try to get an appointment with my doctor soon, I have to wait and call the office tomorrow. Then lose sleep as I wait for the appointment, then panic as I wait for test results . . . I'm sure I won't be sleeping for a while.
Then I think I hear my son cry during the night, like his injection site is bothering him. I think maybe the Tylenol wore off, and he needs a new dose. But he slept fine, and took some Tylenol this morning. He's playing and rambunctious, as usual. But the mom instincts don't stop, the worry finds it's way into my daily life for a full 24 hours a day.
This is my definition of motherhood, by the way. Motherhood: A state of constant and intense worry, punctuated by moments of unimaginable emotional bliss. That's really what it is to me. The unprecedented bliss is what I live for, and it's worth all of the worry.
Well, that's my rambling for the day. Hope to hear from some people out there, just so I don't feel like I'm talking to myself or lost in cyberspace. No pressure, though. When you're ready. :)
Till then, take care. Blog ya later.
R
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label health. Show all posts
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
Good Meeting
If you know anything about bipolar disorder or depression, you might know that the medications needed to balance out brain chemistry in this way also cause weight gain. So, I also have difficulty losing weight, even if I do everything right.
This was the case last night at my Weight Watchers meeting. I didn't gain, but I didn't lose. I know I did everything right, increased my activity, ate right, counted my points . . . But there was no change in my weight. It's very frustrating, and it's a place I've been far too many times in the past. I know that probably the only thing I did wrong was to expect something. In spite of that dissappointing news, I had a good meeting. The group leader talked to a few people who had experience weight gains while following the program conscientiously, as well as some people who had faced weight loss plateaus before. A few people had gone through what I went through, very similarly, although I'm not sure they faced plateaus at only week 3. But there were other people with thyroid problems and a lady who just found out she had diabetes. They all said going to the meetings will help, and I'm hoping that will be the case for me. It's the one thing I haven't tried, having help with my weight loss. I've always gone alone, done the diet thing by myself, and always given up. It's hard to stay motivated when you see no results. I'm still worried about it, but as one of the women put it last night, "If you give up, you know nothing good will happen." So, I'm sticking with it.
I've been feeling light-headed and dizzy lately, too. I'm not sure what's going on there. I don't trust myself driving. I hope it's nothing serious. Since the doctor thought my ovarian cyst was not the cause of my abdominal pain, I'm not sure what the problem really is, and that makes me nervous. I may be scheduling an earlier appointment to see my general practitioner than I had originally planned. Such is my life now, doctor to doctor to doctor trying to keep everything in balance and order. It's hard knowing that without modern medicine, I doubt that I would even be ALIVE. I feel weak sometimes, although I know it's through no fault of my own that my body has these malfunctions.
Anyway, that's enough self-pity for one day. Time to play with my son and have a belated breakfast. My thyroid hormones prohibit me from having breakfast at a normal time some days, especially if I take them later than planned. So if I want dairy, I have to wait 2 or 3 hours after taking the pills to eat.
Guess I'll write more later, as soon as I get a chance. I mean to post some pictures on here, too, but I just haven't decided what to do here yet. It's like a second chance to get this blog the way I want it to be, so I want to take advantage of it.
Take care, folks, and I'll blog ya later.
R
This was the case last night at my Weight Watchers meeting. I didn't gain, but I didn't lose. I know I did everything right, increased my activity, ate right, counted my points . . . But there was no change in my weight. It's very frustrating, and it's a place I've been far too many times in the past. I know that probably the only thing I did wrong was to expect something. In spite of that dissappointing news, I had a good meeting. The group leader talked to a few people who had experience weight gains while following the program conscientiously, as well as some people who had faced weight loss plateaus before. A few people had gone through what I went through, very similarly, although I'm not sure they faced plateaus at only week 3. But there were other people with thyroid problems and a lady who just found out she had diabetes. They all said going to the meetings will help, and I'm hoping that will be the case for me. It's the one thing I haven't tried, having help with my weight loss. I've always gone alone, done the diet thing by myself, and always given up. It's hard to stay motivated when you see no results. I'm still worried about it, but as one of the women put it last night, "If you give up, you know nothing good will happen." So, I'm sticking with it.
I've been feeling light-headed and dizzy lately, too. I'm not sure what's going on there. I don't trust myself driving. I hope it's nothing serious. Since the doctor thought my ovarian cyst was not the cause of my abdominal pain, I'm not sure what the problem really is, and that makes me nervous. I may be scheduling an earlier appointment to see my general practitioner than I had originally planned. Such is my life now, doctor to doctor to doctor trying to keep everything in balance and order. It's hard knowing that without modern medicine, I doubt that I would even be ALIVE. I feel weak sometimes, although I know it's through no fault of my own that my body has these malfunctions.
Anyway, that's enough self-pity for one day. Time to play with my son and have a belated breakfast. My thyroid hormones prohibit me from having breakfast at a normal time some days, especially if I take them later than planned. So if I want dairy, I have to wait 2 or 3 hours after taking the pills to eat.
Guess I'll write more later, as soon as I get a chance. I mean to post some pictures on here, too, but I just haven't decided what to do here yet. It's like a second chance to get this blog the way I want it to be, so I want to take advantage of it.
Take care, folks, and I'll blog ya later.
R
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
